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Design Objectives

The objective of this site is to showcase some of the technology that we offer in website development and to be a fun place to visit. Which makes us wonder what in the world you are doing here in the midst of all this techno-geek garbage. Get out while you have some of your sanity left! If it's too late for that, then read on.

We have optimized* for Netscape 3.0 with the Shockwave for Director 5 plug-in and the standard Windows 256 color palette at 640x480 resolution. That means that if you have those installed and tuned properly and you didn't leave your dog outside on a cold night, then most of the stuff should work at least some of the time. We also do some testing with Internet Explorer 3.0 and some earlier versions of Netscape. They usually don't work. If you have anything else, you're lucky to even be able to read this paragraph.

*Well, "optimized" is really an oxymoron used in conjunction with 640x480 and 256 colors. What we mean is that we've designed to that as a least common denominator. If you want optimum viewing, go to something like 800x600 with true color.

General Tips

Frames

We've divided the screen up into sections called frames. If you've never worked with frames before, get ready to go nuts. Two things to be aware of:

• The navigation buttons on your browser act differently in frames if they work at all. Use our navigation which is on screen all the time.
• Screen real estate is at a premium. We have suggestions listed under the browser categories.
• You may get some screen discoloration with Netscape. Usually can be fixed by minimizing and restoring the Netscape window.
• I can't count.

Philosophy

Love is a stumphole full of grasshoppers.

Netscape

General

These comments should apply to all versions of Netscape. Anything specific to a version will be listed below by version. If this section gets too long, we'll put a sub-index for it here. Or else we'll just quit updating it. We'd rather be working on your website than ours anyhow.

• If you want to see everything, you will probably need to take some screen acreage away from Netscape. Under the Options menu, turn off everything you don't use--like Directory Buttons, Toolbar, and Location. If you show the Toolbar, you can minimize its size by getting rid of the icons and making it text only. This can be done under Options, General Preferences, Appearance. After you have the options the way you want them, be sure to click on Save Options under the Options menu unless you want to do it all over again the next time you use Netscape. Another possiblity would be to change your screen resolution to something higher than 640x480, if you have that option.
• If you are overriding the document colors and you have a problem reading navigation links, it serves you right. Go to Options, General Preferences, Colors and uncheck the box that says to always use your colors. Or else change your colors to something you can read. Or buy a new monitor (that won't help, but if you were looking for an excuse.....).
• If Netscape is giving you a lot of GPFs under Windows 3.X, try changing to Windows 95. Then you will get illegal operations instead.
• If you listened to our nerd and downloaded Shockwave and the "Interactive" button still tells you that you don't have the required plug-in it may be because you didn't install it after you downloaded. Download=Install? Not!

• This version will not let us get rid of the borders around the frames (segments of the screen). Besides looking bad, this uses up screen space and you will definitely have to eliminate some of the stuff at the top of the screen (see "General" section above).
• If you use the Netscape BACK or RELOAD buttons, you will not get what you expected unless you were expecting chaos. Our navigation buttons should get you where you want to go as long as you don't try to do something foolish like leaving our site.
• The nerd says to remind you that you should have listened to him and downloaded 3.0. That's easy for him to say.

• No Frames
• No JavaScript
• No Shockwave
• No Dice

Internet Explorer

We have been testing with Explorer 3.0. Other than yucky colors, everything seems to be working at this point (but it didn't come easy).

Other Browsers

I feel all wierd inside. Didn't think anybody could actually get to this point with another browser. Got to take a few more of those funny shaped pills and keep going. If you will let us know what browser you're using and what it does on this site, we'll add that information to our vast warehouse of information.

Compuserve

Dick was supposed to supply this information, but he hasn't turned it in. I think his dog ate his notes. Yeh, that's it. The dog ate his notes and then the dog bit him and he had to go to the hospital. The dog ate his notes and bit him and he went to the hospital and then he died. Yeh, that's it--Dick died and couldn't turn in this section. Actually, he just got drunk and passed out. Shame, Dick!

America On Line

We haven't tried to access via AOL yet. Just thought you might be impressed that we know what AOL stands for.

Windows

Nothing specific to Windows yet, but you can bet there will be. We'll let you know.

MacIntosh

We haven't tested on a Mac. Probably because we don't have one. We will try to get some feedback down the road. We expect some color issues, especially with the "Interactive" animation since it was done with the Windows system palette.

OS/2

We wondered if anyone would actually look for tips under this heading. If you are using OS/2, you are obviously a smart--no, brilliant--person who doesn't need our help. Please forgive us for wasting your time.